You come into my space to give me your assessment of the fate of butch and femme. You come into a femme’s space, a butch loving femme’s space, to inform me that “queers” no longer identify with us and that we are no longer relevant or fashionable. And you take a deeply meaningful and powerful identity, and regurgitate it and spit it out at me as an insult.
Butches were pioneers in paving the way to lesbian visibility, and throughout lesbian herstory they took the homophobic punches on behalf of all of us, and still do every day of their lives. Nowadays your kind dismisses them as politically incorrect, and exiles them to a land of shame and guilt, not acknowledging them, understanding them and fully accepting them in the safe spaces that they fought to secure for your dumb ass to enjoy in peace. They are human beings with an innate desire to live and present themselves as their nature dictates, how dare you insinuate butch is a slur.
The butch femme attraction is not “on its way out”, the butch femme attraction transcends time. The mutual love of a butch and a femme is a very old pattern, and for some of us, the happiest. Butches and femmes seek each other because we are balm for each others’ soul, especially in a world that doesn’t understand. Our relationship gives us the freedom to grow into the fullness of our humanity. We bring out in each other the final and most complete expression of ourselves. The butch femme thing is pretty magical. It is an authentic, equal, balanced union, and only those of us who have experienced this attraction know the delight in finding a true mate, one who is like us, yet different.
Your message was disrespectful. If you don’t get it, you don’t get it, don’t bother me. We live and identify as we live and identify. We do not require anyone’s validation but we will command everyone’s respect.